The pressure in the crypto world is overwhelming. For a while, I felt very insecure. Yesterday, I saw someone quoting Freud's analysis, and it was an eye-opener for me.

Turns out I'm not a pervert, just overloaded with stress.
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Sexual Fetish Analysis—from Aristotle

Enjoying humiliation and verbal abuse: Often ignored by your family of origin, living like an invisible ornament. This is a self-destructive performance to confirm your own existence. Society demands that you constantly become a better person; humiliation fulfills the need to abolish yourself—it's a spiritual rebellion against the oppression of modern civilization.

Calling someone "Mommy": A need for someone who unconditionally accepts and embraces all your weaknesses and fulfills all your desires, greatly alleviating separation trauma.

Calling someone "Daddy": Gaining a sense of absolute security by submitting to a powerful, unquestionable, absolute will.

Emotional deprivation in the family leads to seeking toxic relief in sex life.
Fulfilling your fetishes is just a painkiller, not a cure. The more desperate punishment after the calm is the realization that you are a prisoner who longs for love but will never obtain it.

Ultimately, the goal of all of this is that I am finally not myself.
A brief return to a life without pressure.
Receiving the grace of exemption from identity, the dissolution of social and moral discipline, and the temporary forgiveness of existence.

If you don't get it, get lost.