#Ohmygod

In 2110, the world was still suffering, war continued endlessly, oil prices kept rising, housing prices plummeted like a tide, the economy was in recession, finance was sluggish, and the crisis swept over once again, binding the fate of humanity tightly together...

At the finals of the "Earth Language Championship", the Secretary-General of the United Nations couldn't contain his emotions and shouted angrily: "There are only about 200 countries in the world, yet over 7,000 languages have been produced. This undoubtedly leads to many problems between countries, all stemming from communication issues. The root cause is the lack of a unified language, with everyone speaking their own language, and no one truly understanding each other's meanings. The two languages that have made it to the final round are — Chinese and English. To the eliminated languages in the audience, you are both spectators and judges, so make sure to keep a good watch!"

The Chinese stood up and sang directly: "The whole world is speaking Chinese, and Confucius's words are becoming more and more international."

English said: "Chinese children start singing our alphabet song from kindergarten!" After saying this, English proudly swayed its head and sang: "ABCDEFG, HIJKLMN, OPQRST, UVWXYZ..."

The game starts at 1 to 1, with Chinese and English finishing in a tie at the first station.

The secretary general took out a piece of drawing paper: "In the picture, a person and a cow are walking on a small path in the countryside, with colorful flowers on both sides. The sun is setting, and there are red clouds on the horizon. May I ask what the person and the cow said? Please respond!"

English was so anxious that he stomped his feet: "Oh my god!! Who could have guessed this?"

"Secretary-General and esteemed judges and audience, I am aware of the content of the conversation about 'One Person, One Cow.' I would like to apply for 8 hours of speaking time. I have initially conceived the movie, TV series, stage play, serialized novel, storytelling, children's picture book, poetry, songs, Peking opera, crosstalk, sketch comedy, Sanjuban, Kuaiban, Jingdong drum, shadow play, Er Ren Zhuan, witty rhymes, tongue twisters, and couplets. I also designed a scene where the cow is in front and the person is behind, and they can perform a segment of a dialogue act. If it is adapted into storytelling, it can also be narrated under the overpass for seven days and nights..."

The secretary-general said with a dropped jaw: "In the second round, Chinese won decisively, and in the third round, it's free play!"

English grabbed the microphone: "Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the Earth Language Gourmet Carnival! Thank you to each and every one of you for joining us as we gather in this culturally rich feast. May every dish today warm your taste buds, and may every toast bring us closer together. Let us enjoy this wonderful time on our taste buds and create unforgettable memories!" After saying this, English was clearly out of breath, taking 26 seconds and 58 milliseconds.

Chinese Simplified: "Everyone eat well and drink well" - effortlessly, in less than 1 second, concise and clear.

The Secretary-General and everyone were amazed and astonished, and after being stunned for a few seconds, they repeatedly praised and clapped. The Secretary-General posed the final question: "Why is China referred to as 'china' internationally?"

"Because... because... this..." English put down the microphone, unable to explain clearly.

In Chinese, confidently picking up the microphone, he said: "After Qin Shi Huang unified the six states—building the Great Wall, standardizing the script, unifying the currency, unifying the measurement tools... Foreigners respect Qin Shi Huang, thus defining China as 'China' based on the pronunciation of 'Qin'."

Languages from all over the world were stunned, speechless, and in awe, all shouting together: "Chinese wins, Chinese wins"

Secretary-General of the United Chinese Language: "The Jingzhong soldiers, oh no, it is the Jingzhong languages who watched the whole process and witnessed the final testimony, and now I declare that Chinese is the universal language of the world, and it will be valid forever!" After speaking, the secretary general walked to the portal on the side with his hands behind his back, and shouted in Chinese: "Thank you, may I ask your surname?" ", The secretary general of the United Chinese language looked up to the sky and laughed: "It's you who fight!" It's you who fight!! My surname is Qin !! ” Oh my god
May 29, 2025 Thursday 10:59 PM