#Ohmygod

As human awareness of copyright protection continues to grow, more and more fields and themes are ruthlessly occupied, and this perversion and absurdity reached its peak madness in 2169.

Professor Du Ziteng shouted in the bathroom, "I’m done, send me a piece of toilet paper." As soon as he finished speaking, the detection light above his head emitted an alarm prompt saying: "I’m done, these four characters have been registered by a kindergarten in this city, you need to pay a usage fee of 3 yuan." Before Professor Du Ziteng could get angry, a bank SMS notification arrived: "Dear user, I’m done—3 yuan has been paid, monthly subscription only 29.9 yuan."

In a five-star hotel, the general manager was furious and pointed at the staff and shouted: "Welcome to 20 yuan once; Hello, thank you, 8 yuan each; You walk slowly and welcome you to come again next time, this whole sentence is 58 yuan, how many times have you banned it yourself this month? We're on the verge of bankruptcy. The employee answered: "I remember", and the general manager hurriedly stepped forward to cover his mouth: "I remember - this sentence has been preemptively registered by the restaurant next door, let's say it once, their net profit is 25 yuan"

At the marriage proposal scene, the man meditated cross-legged, holding fresh grass in his hand and was about to confess to the woman in front of him, he was just about to shout the sentence: "dear", the chip in the brain had detected his thoughts in advance, and immediately sent out an alarm to stop it, he immediately changed his mind, ready to say affectionately: "I love you", the chip in his brain issued a forced prompt again, and he changed his mind again: "Are you willing to marry me?" The brain uses an electric shock directly this time. In the end, he didn't spit out a word of grievance. The girlfriend opposite looked at his sincere gaze, seemed to understand something, and boldly confessed: "I am willing, I am willing", and the mobile phone online bank immediately received a text message: "Dear user, I am willing - has been applied for a patent by a scumbag girl in this city, a single deduction of 521 yuan, you have used it twice today, 1042 yuan has been deducted, if you order the word economic package, reply to WJSSB to enjoy 7.41 discount"

The final presentation in the courtroom was extremely important, with the media and the crowd gathered, cameras pointed at the plaintiff and the defendant, and the tables in the seats were filled with recording equipment and microphones. As long as the plaintiff says: "I am a good person, I am wronged, I am not guilty, he is the one who is wrong, he is the murderer" will easily win the lawsuit, he picked up the microphone with great confidence, only to see the plaintiff's lips moving, but not to see him speak, the more he wanted to say, in exchange for twitching all over, and finally the plaintiff fell to the ground, and the person who came to carry him smelled the smell of burnt paste on his body. The defendant smiled and said lightly: "I am a good person, I am wronged, I am not guilty, he is the one who is wrong, he is the murderer", as soon as these words came out, the audience ushered in bursts of applause, and the judge dropped the hammer on the spot and announced that the defendant was acquitted, sentenced the plaintiff to life imprisonment, and retired from the court!

The defendant took a deep breath and muttered to himself: "Compared to a life sentence, this statement subscription fee is only 100,000, what a bargain, you want to fight me? Hmph!" Oh my god

June 11, 2025 Wednesday Beijing Time: 11:31 AM Author: Zhou Yong